Oregon:A 33-year-old man who struck customers with light sabers at the Toys R Us at Hayden Island has been sentenced to 45 days jail and possible mental-health treatment. David Allen Canterbury told Judge Kenneth Walker that he is already seeking mental-health treatment. Canterbury also apologized to his victims.
Portland police said Canterbury swung the Star Wars sabers - one in each hand- at three customers on Dec. 14 at about 9:50 p.m. at the store at 1800 Jantzen Beach Center. He then carried the light sabers outside the store and swung at police. Officers tried to use a Taser to subdue him, but Canterbury successfully deflected one of the wires away.
Canterbury has been banned from Toys R Us. The judge did not give him additional time for violating the terms of his probation for a previous heroin-possession conviction.
This might be the best story I blog about all year and I'm not even mad about it. You got a crazy guy with not just one, but two lightsabers, just kicking ass and taking names at Toys R Us. Then, when the cops show up he pulls a total Luke Skywalker move and just swats the tazer away. Now I'm not an anti-cop guy but in this situation what were they thinking? You can't subdue a Jedi master with a taser. That's like trying to hit a Randy Johnson fastball with a wiffleball bat. Hey, while you're at it why don't you try to catch a Zdeno Chara slap shot in your mouth?
All that being said, I wonder how the prison populous is going to respond when they find out this dude's in jail for assault with a lightsaber? I'd imagine it'd be similar to the way they'd treat someone that was in jail for jerking off a dog except instead of barking like a dog while they were inside of you they'd probably just quote Yoda.
(skip to 1:38 for line)
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